All the factions involved in the warring on Downing Street agree that it boiled down to “who controls Boris”. Which makes him sound less like a prime minister than a TV remote being wrestled over by squabbling aides.
It can’t be long before the prime minister is required to take a 700 mile weekly drugs test. For performance diminishing drugs.
At PMQs there’s only one person who looks fit to run the country and it’s not Boris.
Do get your head round the fact that we live in a country where in the midst of our various shitshows, the prime minister was performing for coins mere feet from some guy who once offered to bring up one of his spare kids. Even if The Jeremy Kyle Show hadn’t been axed, this would be a scenario simply too trashy to air.
I have a confession to make. Boris Johnson and I have a quite a bit in common. We attended the same Oxford College (Balliol). We studied the same subject (classics). We were presidents of the same debating society (the Oxford Union). However, a crucial difference is that I gave up being an undergraduate when I left university four decades ago.